Short Story: The Pitch

She walked into the producer's office, her hands clammy with nerves, but her face beaming with excitement. The producer, sitting in his imposing leather chair, removed the cigar that was balanced between his lips, and opened his mouth to speak, but before he could get out a sound, the girl enthusiastically began her pitch.

"I've had this idea for a movie." She scrambled with the disorganised pile of paper notes she was carrying, took a breath, and began.

"It starts with Australia being ravaged by fire. Meanwhile in the US, the President is going through an impeachment trial. A war still wages in the Middle East, (plus we'll throw in the odd plane crash, because it's more realistic that way), the UK splits from the EU & the W.H.O. declare a virus a WORLDWIDE PUBLIC HEALTH EMERGENCY.

The stock market crashes, and Italy goes into full lockdown. W.H.O. announces the virus is a Global pandemic. Mount Everest closes and Spain follows Italy into lockdown, more stock markets crash. The worldwide death toll begins to rise, as do tensions, (and then we'll throw in a train crash). Now the Olympics is cancelled.

Soon, EVERYTHING IS CANCELLED! No one can cross borders, the death toll still rises, everywhere locks down. Conspiracy theories begin to emerge, and people actually begin to believe them. Oil prices fall and - you'll love this - a weasel shuts down the Hadron Collider, probably causing all sorts of damage that we can't even begin to imagine yet.

Oh, and remember the weasel - he's important later...

So, the world goes to shit, then Ebola decides to make an appearance. The US decide to cut funding to the W.H.O. because well...," she shrugged nonchalantly, "...so now they're on their own and drinking disinfectant under the advice of their president.

The UK's death toll rises to one of the highest in the world, followed by the US, (who are still drinking disinfectant), and countries begin releasing prisoners to protect them from the deadly virus while incarcerated. Meanwhile, in Canada, of all places, there's a deadly killing spree, and war still wages in the middle east.

The Pentagon release official footage of UFOs, and the first radio burst is detected from inside the Milk Way. Oh, and an asteroid makes a near-earth approach. The death toll from the virus rises further, as civil unrest begins within groups in the U.S. On the plus side, scientists find a way to potentially control malaria.

Astronomers discover a black hole visible to the naked eye, and there's a giant gas leak in India. Meanwhile reports emerge that North Korea's leader has died.

Here's the twist; HE'S NOT DEAD! But he starts getting all hostile toward South Korea. There's a couple more plane crashes and a huge storm that batters the Australian coast. American cops choose this moment to murder a black man & the best of humanity come together for an incredible movement known as 'Black Lives Matter'.

So, now it's Pride month, and a famous children's author gives the impression that she's not up for trans rights, so the best of humanity come together again to support the trans community, the LGBT community AND the black community. Despite there still being a global pandemic, there's now a revolution and millions of humans demanding change..."

The producer sat forward in his seat and raised his hand, gesturing her to finish speaking. "Let me stop you right there. I've heard enough." He fiddled with some papers on his desk, frustrated and confused.

"What's this movie called, anyway?" he asked, the exasperation showing in his voice.

"2020", she replied nervously, still beaming.

The producer sunk back into his chair, taking a deep drag from his cigar, and exhaling the smoke along with a sigh of bewilderment.

"It's not that we don't like elements of your ideas. It's just that, well, it doesn't really seem believable enough as one big storyline. It's just not a realistic scenario... Sorry."

The girl stood in silence, a blank expression hiding any emotion she may have been holding back. The producer noticed her discomfort and broke the awkward silence that filled the room. "What about that weasel, anyway?", he chuckled.

"Well," she paused and took another deep breath, "he's the only survivor."

Victoria Collins